tentative paint

it’s been a long time 
since i’ve drawn or painted anything,
and sure i’d like to pick up a paintbrush again,
even though i’m also certain what i would
have to paint wouldn’t be technically sound,
nor all that disciplined,
but i’d have acrylic under my nails once again,
and i might feel as if i made something,
even though i probably should have strangled it
before it got loose