Constant Seeker, Occasional Finder
by Fred Aiken
If humans had taglines, mine would probably be “Constant Seeker, Occasional Finder.” Though it kind of sounds like a horrible descriptor for an online dating profile, it also perfectly captures my restless curiosity and the rare, fleeting moments of discovery that interrupt the monotony.
I’m the person who gets lost in Wikipedia rabbit holes, clicking from one article to another until I’ve gone from medieval history to quantum physics. My bookshelf is a testament to this endless quest, filled with everything from philosophy to DIY manuals, all with their spines barely holding on for dear life. I also have way too many books on my wish list. I keep meaning to stop adding new books to it, but then I will discover one, then ten or twenty, new books I want to read, and before you know it, I have thousands of books on a wish list I will probably never have time to fully read through.
I also tend to take on various free online courses on subjects or topics that have nothing to do with my profession, but I always had a tangential curiosity about. I tell myself I’m trying to improve myself, to develop as a person. But the reality is that I’m trying to distract my ADD brain from distracting me from doing something unproductive, like watching 7 hours of Youtube videos about people and things that I could care less about. And yes, I see the irony in distracting my ADD by focusing my time and energy into learning new and different things.
Amid all the seeking, there are those moments when I stumble upon something profound—a new perspective, a solution to a lingering problem, or a piece of art that resonates. These moments are rare, but they make the constant searching worthwhile.
Sometimes, I imagine life as a series of treasure hunts, each day a new map with clues leading to hidden gems. I’m not just living; I’m on a quest, each moment filled with potential discoveries. Whether it’s a new favorite cafe or interesting cup of coffee that has gone through a new processing method (like koji anaerobically processed Colombian coffee was pretty cool), a meaningful conversation, or a sudden epiphany (though they seem to be fewer and far between the older I’ve gotten), these finds add a layer of richness to my otherwise solitary existence.
Fred Aiken Writing 